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It Begins As A Thought


It begins as a thought. A sarcastic musing when I read an email or a mean spirited brood over a status on Facebook. An uncharitable opinion, a negative view, a snarky jab. This isn’t who I am but this is exactly who I am when I don’t pay attention to what I’m doing.

It’s embarrassing to catch myself having these thoughts. They say that I think you are not good enough, smart enough, worthy enough. You are not enough. And if you follow the rule of ‘you spot it, you got it’, then I am not enough.

I tell myself that these are just thoughts. Harmless thoughts that go through my mind as I see something. But they feed off each other and it doesn’t take long for these thoughts to grow into actions. A snap at my kids when they ask for my time, an eye roll at my husband when he speaks, a curse word at the driver in front of me.

Just minor behavior at this point. Nothing has escalated but there’s still time. Time for more negative thoughts, petty opinions, graceless assumptions.

It’s a rotten day, I’m in a bad mood, these kids are driving me crazy, who do these people think they are…

I drop a glass, yell at the dog, make my daughter cry, burn dinner…

These are no longer just thoughts. They are what I’ve become.

An entire life can be built around these thoughts. We all know a Negative Ned, a Debbie Downer, a Prophet of Doom.

Did you ever consider how it all begins? It begins as a thought.


My blogging bestie Michelle at Lipstick and Laundry is guest posting today at Coach Daddy and their collaboration made me realize that I haven’t posted a quickie in awhile. Head over to see what they have to say about blogging!

28 responses to “It Begins As A Thought”

  1. The topic at the lunch table today – the downward spiral of negativity. But I’d be pretty unhappy if I didn’t have a little snark and sarcasm in my life. It’s ok to feel crappy or have a crappy day. And you’re aware of it – that’s the difference. Take a breath and turn yourself around. But don’t drive away all the snark in ya – we all need a little snark.


  2. Perfect timing for me and this post. I was going to go into a rant yesterday about work and life (what else, right?) and then something happened that made me remember that it is so easy to vent vs. be nice to people sometimes…and ourselves ❤


  3. Maybe I’ve been too accepting of my faults:). The sarcasm while driving, bouts of negative thoughts. But I’ve learned if I don’t make a big deal and love myself through it, I don’t focus on it or get stuck in it. Great reminder from you that I need to be on the watch, though . . .


    • Thanks Kristine. I love the idea of being an observer to one’s thoughts and moving on. That’s a great way to let it go and not let the negative thoughts snowball. But I get in trouble when I don’t recognize that it’s happening in the first place and then can’t move on. You can never be too accepting of your faults as long as you don’t get mired down by them. It’s when they become such a heavy burden that it becomes hard to see where I played a role in getting myself there.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Ahhh, such a simple gentle post to remind us on the power of thought. Thankfully a thought can be changed. And as we are the only ones in our head thinking these thoughts we have the power to change them. How empowering when we know that.
    great post.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Karen, I’m so inspired by your thoughts. Your post. The links you shared to Coach Daddy and Lipstick and Laundry. All of it. My mind has been racing for weeks now with regards to my recovery, my journey, my writing and my blog/site and how I want to move forward as I begin my second year out in the world. Your post today both grounded me and gave me more momentum to keep moving. Growing. Stretching. I feel held by your reflective words and connected to a larger blogging community after today. Thank you for being in my life!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. You might have inspired a post from me here. My immediate thought: I often feel like I’m the one absorbing the universe’s pinata swings. There are those of us who fulfill that role. Sometimes the pinata wants to take the bat and … break it over our knee.

    It does start with just a thought. Imagine if that thought was of kindness and compassion?

    Thanks so much for the link, too. I had a blast collaborating with Michelle.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for inspiring me to just write! I can really overthink it sometimes.

      I’m horrible at thinking negative things about people when I’m driving. I finally realized that driving brings out anxiety in me and I’m taking it out on other people. Just shifting my attitude from “what an a-hole” to “he’s being extra careful with his kids in his car” calms me down.

      Liked by 2 people

  7. Awwww….so much good in this quickie this morning. What a great reminder that what we think/say matters. Just the other day, my husband said, “Quit yelling at me. I’m tired of you yelling at me.”
    It stopped me in my tracks. I’m not a yeller by nature, and didn’t even know I was doing it. I was tired/burned out/grumpy and taking it out on the person who deserved it the least. His words (and now yours) make me stop before I speak, and aware of where the ugliness comes from.

    Is it saying too much that I made up to him with a “quickie?”
    Oh well, I just did!

    (and ps – thank you for the shout out at Coach Daddy’s site! It was a fun project)


    • Haha! We all need a good quickie. 😉

      I’ve been catching these thoughts a lot lately, but at least if I catch them, I can choose a different path.

      I love your guest post! I need to catch up on Coach Daddy’s posts. It’s been awhile. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • Yes! The skill is in the catch!! Isn’t it crazy how it becomes a habit and, as you said, a LIFE! All of the sudden, you’re like, “But that’s not the REAL me.”…until it is. Your words couldn’t have been more timely. Thank you (and my hubby thanks you!)

        Liked by 1 person

  8. Its the beginning of a downward spiral for me, when I start out doing what your talking about here. I have to guard against them and not let them continue. So I am glad you wrote this entry.

    Liked by 1 person

    • It’s the same for me. The negativity just snowballs and then I’m in such a funk. If I catch the pattern too late, it’s much harder to get out of it but if I pay attention to the negative talk as it happens, I can see what I’m doing to myself. And that’s really what it boils down to. It’s a form of self-abuse.

      Liked by 1 person

      • True enough, I never thought of it as Self Abuse but it fits perfectly..Thanks for writing about it. Taking your time and energy to help define a vague thought helps us tremdously.

        Liked by 1 person

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